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Sunday, August 16, 2009,12:06 AM
uh?
i suddenly felt like writing something.
um... criticism welcomed?
i dont think it'll be very good. haha.
what's funny is that im listening to amigo, genie & all those unsad songs while writing this. LOL
am i freaking for doing that? :p

To My Heart,

charaters & their roles

Nam Eunmi - female lead
(means grace & beauty)

Im Jaehwa - Eunmi's crush since childhood
(means respect & beauty)

Kim Sangmin - Eunmi's friend & school's "Mr. Popular"
(means aid & cleverness)


title: To My Heart,
length: unsure. probably around 5 chapters?

Seeing the sight before me, I stopped running and caught my breath. With my heavy chest heaving up and down, I watched how the little boy ran up to the little girl with his umbrella, how he grinned at her and raised the umbrella over her head, how she smiled back seeing him willing to get himself all wet for her.

Was that what we called true love? I don't think so. Being at that innocent age, everyone was so pure, just like angels. Everything seemed true when it was in fact, not. It was only a matter of time until they'll discover that. Or...maybe one of them truly loved the other... maybe he or she might turn out like me. I might seem fine on the outside, happy even, but the truth was that every part of me was slowly dying inside. That gnawing pain that seemed to be slowly dissolving my heart. Those who put on the biggest smiles like nothing's wrong are the ones that fight battles inside that no one knows about.

When I was five, I used to believe that everything I saw in movies were real, that the people who died in the movies really died. Growing up, I finally realised how naive and silly my thoughts were, how everything was just a deceiving act. Hopefully, those little kids over there might turn out different. There was still a ray of hope for them but it was God's choice whether to crush it or not.

The rain started to pour harder. It was almost as if the sky could feel my pain, maybe it was crying for me. Nah... That's impossible. Why would the sky want to cry for me? The tears that were rolling down my cheeks were left unnoticed as they merged together with the raindrops that caressed my face.

Hearing heavy, running footsteps behind me, a bubble of hope slowly appeared in my heart. Maybe he was willing to get dripping wet chasing after me because it was all a misunderstanding and doesn't want me to hate him, maybe... he does love me.

I took my time turning around, fearing that the shock or depression might be too great for me. When I got a good look at the panting figure, the bubble of hope immediately popped. The person standing before me was not Im Jaehwa, but Kim Sangmin. Nam Eunmi, you were a fool for thinking that Jaehwa would be chasing a worthless girl like you...

Dear heart, I'm sorry I let someone break you again...

Kim Sangmin POV ---x

Although the people around her didn't notice the tears strolling down her cheeks, I did. When no one had the desire to run after her, I did. Why did I? Even I'm not sure. My feet magically took control after I saw her bolt past me, I ditched my friends and started running after her. Hearing my name being shouted behind me didn't make me stop running but it only made me run faster.

It was no wonder that she was part of the school's track and field team, she ran faster than a car. Just when I was about to give up in chasing her, she stopped not far away and watched a pair of children under a blue umbrella. She suddenly decided to turn around and face me, but when she did, the hopeful look on her face was quickly replaced by a look of sorrow like she was expecting to see someone else, not me. Ouch, that somehow hurt my pride.

"Nam Eu- Eunmi shi, are you okay?" I slowly approached her and asked.

Without taking a second glance at me, she turned around and mumbled something along the lines of "leave me alone." What is with this girl and stabbing my pride? Wait, why AM I letting her kill my pride? She was like a little sister in need. She needed someone, but no one came to her aid so I think I'll be superman just for a day and help her out. I followed her as she started to walk away.

"Why are you following me?" she asked and turned around to look at me with a glare on her face. Her voice and eyes were as cold as ice, if possible, colder. Unknowingly, I took a step back.

"I'll be your superman for today." I said without a second thought.

Her glare disappeared and a confused but weird look was plastered on her face. She opened her mouth like she wanted to say something but closed it again as she laid a finger on her pursed lips. Was it because of what I said? I thought back to the line that flowed out of my mouth so smoothly seconds ago and mentally slapped myself. That was such a stupid thing to say! But it sounded so cool in my head.

Because I was freaking out in my head, I didn't notice her walk away from me. It was a while before I did and she was already sitting at the sheltered bus stop, watching me run over to her. She sighed, scooted over a little bit and patted the empty seat beside her. Just like an obedient puppy, I sat beside her and started swinging to and fro while tapping onto the plastic seat.

"Kim Sangmin, why did you bother to chase me?" she looked at me again after squeezing the water out of her hair. I loosened up a little after hearing that her tone was less hostile now.

"I told you. I'm going to be your superman today." I couldn't help but grin when an amused smirk appeared on her face instead of the weird look she gave me moments ago.

"So, why were you running away?" since she looked like she calmed down, I took this chance to ask her.

She gave me a hesitant look before she put on a thinking face and looked to the other side. It was only moments later that she turned back to me and was about to answer my question. Sadly, I couldn't hear the answer just yet because after she said "well...", a bus arrived and the bus driver started barking orders at us to stop being so slow and get on the bus or he'd drive off without us.

"F*CK OFF! No one wants to get on a stinking bus when the driver is nothing but a bi*ch! Now, drive off before I decide to get on your bus and shove a stick up your fat as*!" before I could even register what had happened, the bus entrance shut close and the bus drove off at lightning speed.

Nam Eunmi sure is scary. I hope I didn't anger her with my question just now. I don't want to die yet. Seeing me inch further away to the edge of the seat, she gave me a "look-buddy-I'm-not-going-to-kill-you" look. Although I was debating whether I should run away or not, I went back to my original seat just for the sake of cheering her up a little.

"As I was saying before that b*tch of a bus driver rudely interrupted us..." she rolled her eyes when she thought about the bus driver and continued talking.

"Do you know Im Jaehwa?" she suddenly asked me with sparkles in her eyes but they disappeared after a while and her eyes became completely dull.

"Yeah, I do. Why?" Of course I do! He was my sunbae (senior) last year before he graduated. I remember him being very quiet, he always had this bored and deadly look on his face. He might be good looking and all, but I still don't get why the girls swoon over him so much. He never talked to anyone except Nam Eunmi and no one dared to approach him too. She seemed like the only person he wasn't so cold around. I wonder what happened.

"It's because of him. You see, we were friends even since we were little kids. When I was 11 and when he was 13, he got hit by a bunch of bullies for me... after that, he learnt how to fight and gradually, he became colder and colder to everyone..." a sad smile formed and tears started to collect on the brim of her eyes. I nodded for her to continue.

"I fell in love with him after that incident. I thought he loved me back too from the way he acted. He would only smile at me, no one else. And, he would embrace me with a tight hug whenever he or I felt sad. Even after 7 years, he would still smile at and hug only me... that is, until today. When I went to his apartment just now, I saw my best friend with her arms wrapped around his neck and... he looked happy." a single tear streamed down her hot cheeks.

"Maybe he only thought of you as a friend. I mean, smiling and hugging doesn't mean you love someone as a lover..." for some reason, I decided to be straight forward. It was probably for her own good...

"No..." she said calmly. A little to calmly...

"When I was taking care of him while he was sick two months ago, I heard him say "Eunmi... I love you..." with a tear drop dripping off his face in his sleep..." it was then the single tear wasn't lonely anymore. Within a few seconds, a new set of tears started to pour out.

The world seemed to have stopped the moment she cried. Nothing seemed to be moving at that short moment, I couldn't take my eyes off the crying figure before me. Somehow, it felt like it was my fault that she cried but I know for a fact that it wasn't. The sound of the rain patting onto the plastic roof above our heads and Eunmi's muffled sobs were the only sources of noise in this now empty street.

From the corner of my eyes, I saw something sink down in the dark alley. I diverted my gaze to the sudden movement without turning my head. Clutching onto his black dress shirt, the person sat on the wet floor like he was in pain, mentally not physically. Drops of water dripped off his hair. I couldn't get a good look at his face because his bangs covered part of his right eye.

Nae moriga nomuna nappaso
no hanabakke nan morugo
darun saramun bogoitnun non
iron naemaumdo morugetji

Looking at her vibrating pocket, she stopped sobbing. I wonder how a phone could survive after she ran in the rain like that. She took out the wet phone from her drenched pocket and looked at the caller ID. Her face immediately reflected how hurt she was. She took a deep breath and her grip over the phone tightened until her arm started shaking.

noui dwaetmosubul
ponungotdo nan haengbokiya
ajik naui maumeul mollado
kkutnae suchidushi gado

"Please answer it for me and play along. Please..." she held out the phone and looked pleadingly at me. I nodded and took the phone from her.

(jane's note: sentences in green = Eunmi's best friend (Taehee) \\ normal sentences = Sangmin)

"Eunmi... I'm really sorry..."

The voice on the other line was the hurt voice of a female. I'm guessing she's the best friend Eunmi was talking about. I looked over at Eunmi and she nodded for me to answer.

"Eunmi's kind of busy now, do you want to leave a message?"

I heard a small gasp on the other line when she heard my unfamiliar male voice answer her but the gasp was quickly covered up by a fake sneeze. There was a faint male voice in the background asking her what was wrong in a very eager voice.

"Um... who are you? What's Eunmi doing with you?"

"That's none of your business. Do you want to leave a message or not? I don't have all day."

For some reason, I was getting pissed at the girl. What gave her the rights to ask me who I was after what she did to her best friend? What made her think she could question me like that? Who Eunmi was with and what she was doing wasn't any of her business anymore.

"Oh... okay... can you please tell her that I, Taehee said sorry and really want to talk to her as soon as possible?"

"Oppa ah~ are you done yet? You're such a slowpoke." Eunmi called out in a sweet voice and giggled then she continued looking at the raindrops hit the transparent roof of the bus stop.

I hung up after I heard a loud gasp coming from the other side of the line. I saved my number into her cellphone and called myself to get her number then I handed the cellphone back to her. She smiled a sad smile at me after she took it back.

"Thanks. Now Taehee probably thinks I'm with another guy. I'm sure she'll tell Jaehwa about it. Let's see what that bitc* and b*stard does about it." sighing, she stood up.

"Call me whenever you're feeling down okay? Good luck in everything." I smiled and put an arm on her shoulder, she nodded and walked away.

Now, let's see who the guy in the alley is. Walking as quietly as possible, I approached the guy sitting on the alley floor with his face in his palm. He was completely soaked in water but that didn't seem to matter to him. Whatever he had on his mind was troubling him immensely, he didn't even seem to notice me.

Something that suddenly shone caught my attention. Looking for the source of light, I quickly found out that the shine came from the ring he wore on his pinky. That silver ring... it was the exact same ring she was wearing just now... I knew who he was already.

"Hi... Jaehwa sunbae." hearing his name, he slowly removed the palm from his face and looked up.

"What do you want?" he spat out coldly and glared at me.

"I want to know why you're hurting your beloved Eunmi."

"...It was for her own good..."

---------

chapter 1 done.
so, Jaehwa or Sangmin? :3
happy ending or sad ending or something in between?
i know it's too long, i like long chapters so yeah.
read or not, i dont really care. haha.
maybe i'll post this on soompi.
i shall continue chapter 2 next time.
um, any spelling or grammar mistakes?
please do voice out. thanks :D
i shall consider writing what type of ending you guys want :p
(and yes, this is my plan to make all silent readers come out. MUAHAHA)


 
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♣ jane, sora, wasabii or milk
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    Originallyby: Reina &coramdeo || Resources; soompi,dafont&deviantart || Editedby; jane.txy