| Saturday, April 26, 2008,4:02 AM |
is the day, that i dread.
a blink of an eye,
it's already been ten months
ten whole months without you.
ten painful months all of us have to live through.
ten months of missing you.
ten months without seeing your smile
ten months without you is painful, do you know that?
i still remember how much we cried that day.
27th June 2007.
when teacher came into class and announced.
that you had left.
when my mom told me about it before i went to school
i couldnt believe it.
i shouted at her in the car.
it was unbelievable, it was an extremely painful moment for me
when i got to school, i was standing outside looking at the school gate.
staring at the people who were happily walking in.
trying to find you in that big crowd
standing there for half an hour, it made my heart pound
it felt like jumping out
i was desperate. the most desperate time i felt in my whole life
people walked out of the class and asked me if i was okay
i couldnt bear to tell them. i didnt believe it.
but then sie shing came and said "today is freddie's special day."
i glared at him. both angry and shocked.
"it's his birthday." i felt like collapsing on the floor that time
i felt like crying. for what?
but then. you didnt show up
teacher poh told me and reychelle
i remember crying with reychelle outside class while our classmates were staring at us
when michelle came, she was like "what happened?"
she knew something was wrong.
she said "when reych cried. maybe something is a bit wrong. when jane cries, there's a big problem. but when both cries, something really bad happened."
we told her. and she started to cry too.
we all cried outside class. trying to stop.
but our tears were uncontrollable.
it was flowing down like a small stream on our face.
when my eyes were puffy. and i had a tear-stained face
i walked in class while everyone was looking at teacher stella, who was crying.
"our friend, freddie, is gone."
i felt my heart beat stop for that very second. so it was true.
my little stream of tears turned into a huge river.
crying uncontrollably, i looked at the other people
everyone was crying.
everyone was crying for you.
even the boys who never cried
everyone misses you.
it was the most quiet time ever in a class.
1 hour of pure silence.
only our sobs could be heard
looking at your empty seat only made us cry more.
we miss you, we really do
i regret teasing you all the time, i regret not spending enough time with you.
you were my friend, and i was our friend
we had good times and bad.
1 hour of pure silence was ruined when people from other classes started to know
form 1 e came and teased us. because we were crying.
but then vk stepped up. i never saw him that mad before
you could see flames in his eyes.
vk shouted at them
"sorry. your dad did not die here. so please fuck off. because you're not welcome" he shouted in chinese.
the boys all went to the door and shouted at them
i remember shouting "stupid hamsap kia. siam la. fuck off."
seriously, i was so mad that i slammed the door at their faces.
attending your funeral was the most painful part of all.
we were planning not to cry but we couldnt help it.
it was just too painful to hold in.
it's been 10 months already
time flies fast.
right now, i feel like bursting.
i feel like crying, yet no tears are coming out.
we miss you freddie
please remember that your friends here love you.
hope you're having a good time in the beautiful sky above.
Epik High - One
ONE!
Time is tickin′. T-Time is tickin′, tickin′.
Time is tickin′, T-Time is tickin′ away...
(Tablo)
I want to see your tears pour out, pour out without reason
No one knows inside your heart, The glass fragments raging a storm
(Tablo)
The wounds become a sickness, All doors become a wall
I've become an enemy in the mirror, doesn't it hurt?
(Mithra)
[I'll] keep anyone from knowing about you, [I'll] leave the breath to tighten out
I'll force you to choose the end, (aren't I bad?), I'll take away all reason in this world for you to to stand
(Mithra)
Without the choice of the road back, [I guess] you'll walk to the end
Your breath would probably end before my heart
(JiSun)
Wounds... Scars... Tears... Flowing
(When you cry. though you try. say goodbye. the time is tickin′)
(JiSun)
You are wandering through death, (I'll save you...)
(When you cry. though you try. say goodbye. the time is tickin′)
You are the one.
When you're walking in shadows
(When I'm panicking in the shadows, my breath does the same)
you are my savior
I'll reach my hand out to you
(When all the doors in the world close for me, I'll support you with my hand)
you are the one. you are my savior.
.
.
Time is tickin′. T...
.
(Mithra)
Your hand set the world on fire, You closed everyone's eyes
The suffering that was reflected in your eyes like stars become your city
(Mithra)
Are your still dreaming, sleeping? Are you measuring all the tears you've shed?
Hope is a paper boat that sinks, isn't it sad?
(Tablo)
Maybe you wake up drenched in sweat at night, Is consciousness crawling on the floor?
Are you thinking it's the end, are you ok? 'cause I understand
(Tablo)
I'm a scar on your broken body, I'll erase the tears you've hidden away in your shattered marriage
I'll grab your hand With my hand and trust you
(JiSun)
You are wandering through death, (I'll save you...)
(When you cry. though you try. say goodbye. the time is tickin′)
You are the one.
When you're walking in shadows
(When I'm panicking in the shadows, my breath does the same)
you are my savior
I'll reach my hand out to you
(When all the doors in the world close, I'll support you with my hand)
you are the one. you are my savior.
.
you are the one. you are my savior.
.
(Tablo)
Do you have wounds, do you have scars, Are you wandering through shadows?
.
(Tablo)
Do you have wounds, do you have scars, Are you wandering through shadows?
(Faith, Destiny, Love.)
.
you′re still beautiful to me.
.
You are the one.
When you're walking in shadows
(When I'm panicking in the shadows, my breath does the same)
you are my savior
I'll reach my hand out to you
(When all the doors in the world close for me, I'll support you with my hand)
Time is tickin′. T-Time is tickin′, tickin′.
Time is tickin′, T-Time is tickin′ away...
.
.
My savior.
.
.
ONE!
| Tuesday, April 22, 2008,6:58 AM |
every list shall have at least 3 things in no particular order ^^
Animes
- La Corda D'Oro
it's a story about a girl getting a magic violin, given to her by a fairy called Lili. She was encouraged (or rather forced) to join the concours, which is like a competition. joining that, she meets loads of people. (people as in hot guys?? *cough*) my favourite character is Len (Tsukimori, who is the guy with blue hair and has an anti-social attitude) ^^
- Yakitate Japan
Even if you're not a total fan of bread, you can still watch this anime. it's funny and not boring. hahah. plus, you learn loads of stuff. (:
- Kyou Kara Maou ( has a 3rd season already)
it's awesome. enough said. just watch it and you'll know what i mean. xD
- Jigoku Shoujo season 1 and 2
it's scary, entertaining and plain awesome. it's about a girl who gives you a straw doll when you access the hotline to hell. when you pull the red string, the person you hate will be sent to hell, but for a payment, when you die, you go directly to hell. not recommened for scaredy cats who pee in their pants (:
- Black Cat
Finished watching the current season. sheesh. they should have a season 2 D: i watched season 1 like.... 4 times already? and watched some favourite episodes for like 8 times xD fyi, im easily bored. so you can tell how awesome this anime is ;D
- Gakuen Alice
About a girl who has nullifying alice (power), she follows her friend to Tokyo and gets enrolled to Alice Academy (a school for the gifted). there, she goes through alot of stuff, happy, sad, exciting, you name it xD
Will be back with other stuff tomorrow. I gotta go soon. grr! stupid time limit D:
| Thursday, April 17, 2008,1:28 AM |
since i forgot what i did in the morning yesterday, just gonna update about tuition
oh yeah,yesterday i borrow a book from singyee called "Just shocking"
i saw a black part in the book and turned to that page. it was like...
Shocking bedtime stories present "the exploding butterfly"
so damn funny and retarded xD
1st page: once upon a time
2nd page: there was nothing
3rd page: nothing
4th page: nothing
5th page: and nothing
6th page: but suddenly...
7th page: there was an explosion
8th page: the galaxy appeared
9th page: the solar system appeared
10th: the sun and planets appeared
11th: the moon and the earth appeared
12th: all the animals on earth appeared
13th: and there was a pretty pink butterfly
14th: the pretty pink butterfly was fluttering with the other pretty pink butterflies
15th: the bluebird was singing on the willow tree
16th: the little lambs were frolicking through the green meadow
17th: but suddenly,
18th: the pretty pink butterfly exploded
19th: the other pretty pink butterflies exploded
20th: the bluebird exploded
21th: the willow tree exploded
22th: the little lambs stopped frolicking....
23th: ... and exploded
24th: the green meadow exploded
25th: the man walking pass the meadow exploded
26th: his wife exploded
27th: all the animals on earth exploded
28th: the solar system exploded
29th: the galaxy exploded
30th: the explosion exploded
31th: the explosion of the explosion exploded
32th: the explosion of the explosion of the explosion exploded
33th: this is the end because all that is left was nothing
went down to kaling shop with chialing to get my usual supply of bubblegum
i saw the big big bottle de. 2.30 nia. so buy lu.
bring up le, dont know how to open
lonejie open for me and take like... one? along with the other guys xD
for once, kwang ate bubblegum. yes, OMG man o___o
hahaha. lonejie being greedy took 3 of it while chialing pouted about only having two
we ended up eating 4 each. lol. or maybe more
ehh. 20+ gone liaw eh.
we changed the label of the gum xD
it was originally wrigley's doublemint chewing gum
then i made it lonejie's double mint chewing gum xD
made in pakistan one eh! syok!
on the cap, i wrote
lonejie demands you to "BUY ME!" xDD
hahaha. yapepe say the expiry date of the bubblegum is lonejie's birthday in 2009
lol. i say, i keep one till 2009 to give lonejie on his birthday
and yap was like "wahh. when 2009 birthday, jane wait at lonejie's house at 10 am. first one ehhh! then give him birthday present. bubblegum lai de oh."
then lonejie "hahahaha. when i eat i die ah. expired liaw. wah. die during birthday eh!" xD
lol. then when kwang come in.
she was like "eh jane. you know. at first i thought yap wear Baxx Agent shirt xDD"
yap close his face with his book. so funny eh
and the shirt was actually United Nation shirt. hahahaha
then i say Yap is Iraq de Prime Minister xD
hmm. lonejie, i say he's india one but he was like
lonejie: =___= NO LA! PAKISTAN EH!
haha. so lonejie is pakistan wan luu.
teo (or sexyteo by chialing) is Bangladesh one.
im JAPAN :D lol.
today go school boring le.
lol. sit with steven.
steven kesian la.
kena bully by me. hahaha
sorry la steven. meowww~ (:
hmmm... maths period change place with michelle
so i sat with sienchung.
infront was lonejie and linyong
so stupid eh me
sat there bully them but then kena bully by them also xD
got to know our maths marks. YES! I GOT 98! bwahahahaha!
lonejie was being perverted so i sprayed him with water
then he open his bottle and poured water at me when i was messaging gerald
stupid lonejie D:
got me all wet. hmpt!
afternoon we go to the library
lmao. we were like playing there instead of borrowing books xD
saw cheewee they all in a corner, sitting there talking
that kwang ah, kanasai la her. lol. yes kwang you butt
we go "spy" on him with michelle xD
and michelle tried to "xian hai" me
hmmpt! kanasai la michelle.
hahahaha. but then bored liaw la. so go bother him xD
since he was sitting with his back facing the poll thingy
so i poked his head and hid behind it. but lol. he saw me anyways.
and sienchung lol!
kwang made his be responsible for hurting her hand
hahaha. he say anything can la so kwang call him go over to the form 3 girls (who were there), bang their tables and say "hello pretty ladies"
LMAO. was laughing my butt off man xD
meowww~ now im going to go continue writing survival school x:
tata~ xD
| Monday, April 14, 2008,1:52 AM |
lol. taiyou no namidaaaaaa~
koyama is so adorableeeee~ *O*
Sentyee is my new gan ko ko~ (:
yay~
I made some posters yesterday :D
here they are
credits: meghan neechan for picture, deviantart for texture and brush, me for font that i made (subtext)
credit: sanami for brush, paper and texture, dafont for font, deviant art for ferris wheel picture and meghan neechan for leechihoon pictures.
Lee Chihoon's pictures are absolutely photoshoppable *O*
lol. btw, he's a korean ulljang. ^^
meow~ btw, if you're reading this kwang, im still ignoring you ^o^
probably xDD
randomness:
chocolatemilkisaddicting
wonbinworeblueundiesand
minhwan looks chubby O:
lalalala. lalalala. elmo's worldddd~
i am missing carmen. where's youuu?? D:
mei guan xi zhen de mei guan xi xDD
tell me, tell me, t-t-t-t-tell mee~ o___O
credit: super hallie
NO STEALING!
it's mine. seee! SEEE?!
Sora on it. bwahahahahahaha!
yes. mine! *laughs more evily*
oh wait. *hides from neechan*
| Thursday, April 10, 2008,7:20 AM |
texture and brushes: deviantart
font: dafont
first of all,
we have Sora.
she is one of the female leads in Survival School
she is 14 years old
she might seem like a total clutz and your average chocolate loving girl but there is more that meets the eye.
she is kind, caring and smart in most people's eyes.
she loves her brother Jaejin thou she doesnt seem like it
she can always be found sitting under a tree enjoying a good book and a lollipop, hanging out with Yumi, Eunling, Minhwan or Meghan, standing infront of her locker drooling over her Sungmin pictures, running after Mike or being squished by Seungbin in a tight death hug.
but she also pops up at random places like the hallway, on the school ceiling and such
she also pops up at very random places like the janitor's room, the boy's toilet (jane's addition: you perv! D:), a bush and more
Then we have the good looking bad boy,
Seunghyun or better known as Mike
he is 17 years old
he might see like he hates everything, well... he does. inside and out.
he is anti social and cruel when it comes to girls who confess to him
but he has developed a soft spot for Sora and starts to hang out with her.
he does not show his real feelings and is very hard to predict
he treats the people he likes a little better than he treats other people but it doesnt make much difference
his favourite bubble gum is Hubba Bubba's original flavour. and he likes teasing Sora by eating watermelon flavoured ones infront of her then not offering her any
xxxxxxxx
Then last but not least, we have the cute brother Seungbin.
he is 18 years old
he doesnt only look like Mike, but also has the same attitude.
anti social and cruel.
but Seungbin treats his friends and family nicely. he'll be cute and bubbly in front of them
even in public places.
Seungbin might seem like he hates everything but deep down he doesnt which is exactly opposite from Mike.
girls who like him will not believe it when they see how he's like infront of Sora.
his interests includes of squishing Sora with all his might in a deadly hug, messing up her hair and playing games be it computer, play station, nitendo, and such.
yay! i can finally update now!
internet was being mean earlier this day. as in the afternoon
i was only able to go to forums for a limited amount of time
and watch less than 10 videos to keep me entertained
most of the videos didnt play D: and the page turns html without pictures
yes, how i loathe you now
and when i went to the thai uljjang thread in soompi. the pictures wouldnt load.
bad internet day
so i had to spend the day with chialing which was pretty fun xD
we did some Survival School stuff. ^^
oh yeah. morning. oO
nothing interesting happened much except for the games we played and the visit to the biology lab xD
ahh. the games. it was started by me and tiing.
we were shouting each other's name as long as we can without stopping or breathing
lol.. after that, i went to challenge other people
and most of our classmates ended up playing too xD
then we played the staring game. remind me to never play with lonejie D:
his face is too funny that i'll laugh and lose my glare D:
then the holding breath game. lol. i played with shoucong and won. BWAHAHAHAHAHA!
during science we went to the Biology lab for some experiments.
i did most of the front ones.
then i remembered Aik :D
FLASHBACKKKKK~
Aik: Biology is fun. *followed with several approving nods*
Me: It is?! o_____O
Aik: You know? there's a preserved puppy there! :D
Me: O_________________O EWWWW!
Aik: *continues about preserved stuffies there*
out of curiousity, i went to the shelves and looked at the stuff there
then i was like O____O to WOW! COOL!
there was a frog sliced in half. you could see the organs inside!
oh and the preserved puppy.
loads of preserved fishes and snakes
but the most awesomestest one was....
THE TWO HEADED PIGLET!
it had two heads! not one but TWOOOO
it was the most amazing and cute thing i've ever seen
i dont see why kwang thinks it's gross D:
it wasnt the piggy's fault that it was born with two heads.
fanxue go home and get pissed off by internet ^^ lol.
then tuition. hahaha.
best tuition day EVER. but keep kena scolded by teacher D:
i broke my "best friend" status with lonejie xD
jane: teo is my new best friend!
lonejie: noo~ please please~ give me another chance~
jane: no~ teo is my best friend. right teo??
lonejie: DD:
jane: nahh. dont want teo la. *sees gerald*
jane: GERALD! YOU'RE MY NEW BEST FRIEND!
other people there: oO
lonejie: eyer! D:
jane: best friend 1 *points at teo* best friend 2 *points at gerald*
then after that...
we played world war 3 xDD
with bits of erasers as our "advanced technology"
lmao. it started in the CHMS section. chiewniing throw lonejie
then shannon throw me from the other table.
i bushuang then throw her back ^^ lol. then war between me and shan began
slowly it got to lonejie, teo and yap oO
then whole chms plus shannon from PDS started playing
being the evil me, i threw one at gerald xDD
then wenru help get gerald's revenge for him
then i soot them both xD
they other table start play also
the st andrews saw us, chms and maktab sains, playing so they also play
hais, become sien liaw so stopped playing
asked gerald to stop also xD
wahh. gerald you so guai ah? listen to me. lol
derick claimed that they're iraq xD
gerald they all germany
us. CHINA~ xD courtesy of Teo. but i wanted to be Japan D:
so i stuck with it. Japan for Jane! ;D
lol. war end liaw
and the CHMS girls plus Shannon discussed about the things with gerald and the new girl with lonejie they all.
hahaha. then we tried to prove our theory to lonejie by playing with gerald. lol. it was pretty fun xD
mehh. shannon failed D: because lonejie didnt see much change in her face
but i passed. awesomely. bwahahahah~
i told a "secret" to gerald. (x
mehh. gerald was shocked :o and my plan worked
lonejie: WAHH! you know?!? her face change so fast! xDD
^ see :D
anyways, gerald! if you're reading this then you suck D:
i blame you if the girl comes after me D:
hahahaha. youre my new best friend so you should save me from her xDD
anyways, how i spent my day this afternoon
finally. you get to see graphics xD
| Wednesday, April 9, 2008,12:48 AM |
cant blame me, i was spazzing over Super Junior M's U MV
yes, it is hot ;D
i'll post the video after this
still no luck with Mike character picture D:
i'll skip yesterday's update and just say i got 96 marks for my malay which is highest in my class ^^
im awesome. lol xDD
today today,
we got our english paper back.
it totally scared me and made me go well, nervous and such
and my paper was the second last DD:
teacher accidentally gave me lonejie's paper
i almost cried when i saw the mark
i thought it was mine. 34/60. yes, i'd die now D:
but then
teacher: jane. that's not your paper! *laughs* you should look at the name next time *gives paper*
jane: oO *blinks then takes paper* 53/60? 53! 53! WHOOT!
classmates: oO
YES. i got an effing 53! BWAHAHAHAHA! highest? ;D
both plus together and i get 86 ^^
what scared me the most was that only 6 students got 60 above o___o
yeah. scary. and i beat shoucong! in yo face! BWAHAHAHAHA!
being me, i insulted Loh who was "mr english". HA! now try saying jane is retarded in english! *laughs evily*
yerr~ cheewee dont believe i got high marks in commerce and malay without cheating DD:
haha. and science. =___=
mehh. got 84.5. lol at least wont die in tuition teacher's hands.
bwahahahah! just right xD
but lonejie got higher that me by 1 freaking mark DD:
asswipe =____= xD
anyways, super junior M - U mandarin version. as promised
warning: people who faint at the sight of totally hot
disclaimer: I will not be responsible if you face blows up from too much hotness, if you get a nose bleed, if your eyes pop out or if you keyboard malfunctions from too much drool. thank you for reading ^^
my opinion:
Hankyung lives up to his reputation as sexy china man *O* HE'S EFFING HOT *O* maybe he'll need an updated name. super sexy china man. ahh. sounds more fitting ^^ sexy china man owns! HANKYUNG! WHY DO YOU HAVE TO LOOK SO SEXY AT THE MIRROR?! DD: and hankyung solo dance pwns you x:
Shiwon is still hot like before. ^^ no upgrade or anything special. *nods nods*
Ryeowook the hot man can still sing good ;D but is it me or does his hair get weirder everything? .___.
Kyuhyun's new hair and wardrobe makes him look sexy business man material. note: i used man and kyuhyun on the same sentence for the first time without any negativity. :o AH-MAZING x: love baby boy kyuhyunnie's voice (:
Donghae lost his Dont Don bad boy look and got back his innocent U days look xD nothing pretty special about the farting fish master xD sungmin must be happy to be stink free and not hear the imma-about-to-fart tune. OH YEAH, Donghae rapped in chinese. awesome
Henry the sexy violinist is still as hot as ever ;D you gotta love his voilin solo *o* it's hot! and his chinese is good. xD
Zhaomi is pretty adorable too. so i get to finally see his face. and he aint that bad looking. average chinese guy i guess ^^
| Monday, April 7, 2008,1:40 AM |
i was busy looking for a character picture for Mike.
grrr. why did he have to be so...different from the uljjangs?! D:
and yes, my eyes are decieving me
i saw some pretty pictures of some girls
yes, note that they were VERY VERY pretty.
and you know what? they were guys =____=
stupid cross dressing in thailand D:
and yang yang. lol. damn hot guy you know?!
but turns out to be a girl D:
she would be perfect as a guy.
will post pictures if i find it again xD
yes, spending the whole day yesterday lurking in the thailand and chinese uljjang thread in Soompi.
and i STILL DIDNT find a picture fitting for Mike
well, at least I found Seungbin (:
random
HONGKI IN TIGHTS IS HOT *O*
ohnoes D:
i've been pervified by Wen
lmao. my gay ass pervy spammer xDD
btw, for people (*cough*likekwang*cough*) who dont know who uljjangs are:
짱 (jjang): Korean slang that means "best." Ulzzang means "best face" in Korean and the word is used both online and in real life. Basically, an ulzzang is someone who has a very attractive face, but most people use the term to describe people who have become popular for their looks.
anyways, school today was quite okay but boring.
morning assembly, the drama not even funny
HAHAHAHAH. kwang have to stay back because she's a prefect
jawi period geng le
me and michelle were looking at the chinese uljjang thread in soompi xD
english boring la, want to sleep
then PE =____=
how i loathe today's period
the teacher sih be pian xing man.
me and kwang run 3 rounds in the basketball court.
BWAHAHAHAH! we're the fastest to finish
we ran 1 round ahead the others :x
in your face you freaking gay asses! *cough* laiboonkeatandsuch
then we long jump
teacher was being gay. lol
he kept making us jump. the boys first la of course
and soonai so funny man xD
teacher: faster run! dont run like girl like boy de! run like boy bah!
soonai: you baru gay la! make me jump so many time
teacher: oO -continues saying stuff which i freaking dont care-
he made us jump jump jump more than guys D:
i have a feeling that he's homo x:
hahaha. we wouldnt have crossed the line if i didnt *cough*move it forward when he wasnt looking. whattt? he was being gay and making us jump far which we could not do D:
meh. the after that play basketball la :/
nothing interesting much.
and WHOOHOOO~ i finally get to eat chocolate and icecream again after one freaking month
yes, i live off chocolate. patchiii~ (x too bad no meiji DD:
tomorrow going to the lecture hall to see soonai's group movie
lol. soonai told me bong wore a bra stuffed with tissue
hahahahha. i laughed like crazy when he told me xD
mehh. siap liaw? :P
bye bye ^^
will update with idol news or uljjang pics soon.
or maybe even some ps work ;D
| Saturday, April 5, 2008,1:31 AM |
anyways, Somewhere over the rainbow is a NEW NEW NEW style for my blog
noticed the old one had navigations? ;D
im getting sick of those, so yeah.
new one new one new oneee~
WITH A WHOLE NEW STYLE
booyah baby!
this one, i tired to make it look cute??
plus, im lazy to blend stuff now.
so yeah. no humans for now :D
btw, forgot to mention that i recorded my nephew's sucky singing when he was taking a bath
he's so freaking loud you know?
i was standing outside the door still can hear
so i recorded it. *laughs evilly*
i found myself going to Kawaiineh everyday xD
lol. singyee is nice (:
anyways, two updates in one day
awesome right?
lol, jkjk
chatting with duckybutt now
tata~
| Friday, April 4, 2008,11:39 PM |
DUN DUN DUNNN >D
*adds more dramatic music*
keep going down....
and down....
down again.....
okay....
the members are....
super sexy china man - Hankyung aka Hangeng aka Mr athlete
^ no duhh, OBVIOUS
Shiwon aka... i dont know oO
^ he's been training chinese
fishie - Donghae aka Supah Farty Machine
^ BWAHAHA! SUNGMINNIE IS SAVE FROM FART NOW! *snuggles sungmin*
baby boy of Suju - Kyuhyun
^ awweee. my kyuhyunnie is growing up and going to china ^^
super hot violin boy - Henry Lau
^ mhm. of course he's in it ^^ oppa is awesome yo!
Ryeowook aka Wookie
^ AHA! another awesome singer. love his voice *cough*andhisscream*cough*
Zhoumi
^ no idea who that is oO
Credit: thedropp @ SJC LJ Community for the news; ☆린다☆ @ Midnight Sonata for the caps
as expected, JANE IS FLIPPING HAPPY.
now i get to see Suju M. and hear my sexy korean boys (with two chinese boys) sing flipping awesome chinese songs.
no doubt about it, with my sexy
china man in awesome, kyuhyun and ryeowook can REALLY sing well, Shiwon is plain hot, Donghae is adorable, Henry has mad skills and Zhoumi I dont know. but this album will be awesome! it's a must get for me. lol.
anyways, i kicked some retarded butt in school today. whoo for meee~ but but but. sien chung keep pinching my hand. uwuahhh! so painful TwT *kicks sienchung* mean ass DD: and i kept pinching him and linyong back (:
ahh. english. it was quite easy but abit hard at the same time. cheewee say very hard make me scared nia. when i see the paper, i was like *eyes pop out* SO MUCHHHH! now i know why teacher say we can eat in class if we dont finish. good thing finish early. im awesome. lol. oh yeah, cheewee you suck! even if you are my sista DD: you still suck because you dont want to tell me who tell de. TwT
then chinese, no need say liaw, Jane blur blur. lol. mehh. i know i suck at chinese so shut up or i'll kick your freaking butt DD: thankyou lingyong ^@^ even though, i argue with him everyday and bully him, he's a good friend. lol. he always help me and i always help him. see. so good right? xD
im still being ignored. but mehh, im not going to be sad about it. i promised neechan that i'll be happy no matter what 8D neechan, i love youuu~ she's the best, i tell you, THE BEST. make her cry and i'll break your face. ^^ *cough*i'llbeupdatingsurvivalschooljustforyou*cough* JM replied my oversea message. YAY~ im going to bug her at midnight tonight. bwahahaha! yes, umma loves you JM dear~ i'll go to malaysia one day and stalk youu with your gaybo partner Liza~ xD
mhm. yes, today is a happy day :D
anyways, it's Aik's birthday
HAPPY BIRTHDAY AIK ; may all your wishes come true *throws confetti*
Ahh, anyways, I'm making a new blog layout for myself ^^
im getting bored of seeing this one and it's format
Sora shall be taking requests for anything she can do after the new layout is up.
oh, and i get to decide whether i WANT to do it or NOT
so yeah, if i dont know you, i most likely wont do it.
if i hate you, same thing applies ^^
but be warned, i might take some time oO
Kwang, you're welcome to get requests from me anything like always
and yes, that includes blog layouts of your chosen format
im getting bored of seeing this one and it's format
Sora shall be taking requests for anything she can do after the new layout is up.
oh, and i get to decide whether i WANT to do it or NOT
so yeah, if i dont know you, i most likely wont do it.
if i hate you, same thing applies ^^
but be warned, i might take some time oO
Kwang, you're welcome to get requests from me anything like always
and yes, that includes blog layouts of your chosen format
| Thursday, April 3, 2008,6:53 PM |
to ft island fans, CI entertainment is giving back refunds for the cancellation of the concert and the shoe are still on. not canceled. and those who didnt get their cd will get them.
amazing what a fight can do to you, i didnt eat much yesterday since lunch. mehh, i sorta skipped my dinner too. lately, i've been having mood swings. maybe chialing is right. i might be getting crazy. one moment i'd be happy like there's no end, the second i'd be so mad to the point that i might stab anyone with my math instruments, then i'll be laughing my butt of then get depressed. see? one good example was yesterday. probably? i was mad when i got to tuition, then happy again, then mad then happy then mad then laughing my butt off until i cried. depression, jealousy and anger is taking over me.
it's probably my medicine taking over. no one said changing medicines would be good. yes, im still sick. even if it's already been one month that i was. maybe i'd be like this forever? maybe i'd die? but who cares. it's my life and only mine. so lately, my sickness is getting better, so the amount of medicine im taking is lessening and lessening. maybe i'd be better tomorrow if i take a proper amount? maybe i'd die if i take too much? that doesnt sound like a bad idea.
i've been bottling up my feelings too much lately, all that stress was okay last time. i managed to bottle it up and discard it without even knowing. but now i feel like it's too much. all the pressure my parents are putting on me. all the responsibilities. it's eating me up till im no more. so instead of telling other people like my friend advised me, i kept it all to myself so no one would worry about me. i dont know why, i dont like having people being worried about me. i feel like im being a burden to them so i kept it all to myself. sigh. will i become like shou cong if i keep this on? i have alot of things in my mind, yet i dont feel like letting them go. im afraid of losing it all.
my bitchy side is showing alot lately. i've been making alot of people fucking pissed because i have pleasure of seeing them annoyed. i dont know why either. i've been taking insults better than before. back then, when people insulted me, i'd hit them and yell at them. but now, i just nod and say thanks. except for some people, it's fun to argue with them. for example, lonejie?
And i also found myself an emo corner? i noticed that i've been sitting there crying everytime. yeah, im a crybaby, sue me why dont you? people dont know this but, i try my best not to cry in school. when it seemed like i forgot all about it, i go home and cry to myself. i cant help it. i've always tried to think of positive thoughts everytime i cry, but it seemed like more bad thoughts came pouring in. i dont know what to do. im lost. and no one is willing to help me. come to think of it, no one can... i tried my best to be happy these few days, but things just got worse. i got into an arguement with my best friend. now i dont only have pressure at home. but also in school. everywhere i go, i feel pressured. school, home, tuition. when will this end? why is everyone putting pressure on me? WHY? anyways, here's something for my bestie. everything im stating here is true. i admit to my sins. i wont lie. i wont make up things. there's no need for that. i WILL admit for everything bad i did, but i WONT admit anything i didnt do. so just read, it's your choice if you want to respond or not.
remember last year? when we always fight? remember when i was really bitchy to you? and you were really bitchy to me? it was funny, that two people that fought alot in the past can be bestfriends now. fighting can get people closer, huh?
2007. when you and i stopped fighting. you started to trust me because i was nice to you. but being the spoiled and bitchy me, i took advantage of it because i still hated you. you told me about your relationship with him. at first, i didnt want to tell because i forgotten my grudge for you. i helped you keep it a secret, until one day when we were talking about it, someone was listening to us secretly. guess who it was? no one but boonkeat. being the guy that he was, he was like "ahh. so you and *insertnamehere* together la?" in front of us. you and me both tried to deny the fact but he still didnt believe. then it got to michelle. i forgot how she knew... i think you told her yourself or maybe i told her. i also didnt know. when boonkeat start to spread. i still kept quiet for sometime but i DID tell reychelle about it. then michelle also start to spread. after that, HE come to our class and find you. then everyone started to get interested. and seeing you getting pissed and annoyed, it reminded me what i was going to do in the first place. since everyone in class already knew (courtesy of boonkeat and michelle), i let out the nickname you gave him. boonkeat and michelle took the pictures and sent it to me. i kept it in my computer. then when it came to the point that you go SOOOO mad at us, you yelled at us. yes, dont deny the fact that you did. and you also got mad at me. you kept scolding me on msn. to the point that i felt satisfied and started to let go of the grudge.
i kept the pictures for a few days, just to annoy you. but i knew i was going to far, i knew i was being harsh. so i stopped annoying you. satisfied with what i already caused. yes, im selfish. then i started to really treat you as a friend. because you forgave me for what i did afterwards. (but you only forgave me after a few days) i kept my mouth shut about the latest stuff you told me. i didnt tell, did i? i didnt even tell reychelle when you let me see the messages. you two were so happy that i felt like a spoiled bitch for what i did before. but when he broke up with you, i felt worse. i felt like it was my fault. was it my fault? i also dont know. but seeing you sad that time made me know that i was being mean. i tried to cheer you up. i sacrificed some things for your happiness. at that time, i knew i was getting attached to you. after that, i kept everything you wanted me to keep a secret. did i tell? i dont think i did.
then 2008, we became the best of friends. i felt like a little girl getting rewarded with candy for something good she did, i felt lucky. i felt happy. but things changed when i started to change. pure pressure took over. i couldnt be happy like i used to. i wasnt carefree anymore, i had alot of things in my mind that i didnt talk to other people about. what could a girl like me possibly have in her mind? well, alot of different things and alot of different feelings. happiness, sadness, depression? gradually, i started to put my trust on online friends from lovefti and ak. for some reason, they never failed to make me happy. but from time to time, they make me depressed too. reading fanfics made me know how twisted someone's mind can be. i try to stay away from situations like in the fanfics but i started to feel dumb following something that was fake. little did i know, it was the same. the fanfic and in real life.
you told me secrets, i kept them. the only person i told was reychelle and only her. but sometimes, you cant blame me because your OTHER BEST FRIEND was eavesdropping on our conversation in class. it wasnt my fault that i didnt know she was listening to us. and what did she do? go spread it. yet you trust her so much. to the point that i called you dumb for trusting her more than me. you might not know. but she isnt all that you see. looks are deceiving. she might seem like she wont fight against you, but you dont know. you dont know what she told me when you keep saying she like boonkeat. you really dont know. i tried my best to stop everything she did without her knowing. i gave her plans which i faked just so she couldnt hurt you. you know? i was risking my friendship with her because i wanted to help you. you didnt know, and i didnt told you. i didnt want to ruin your friendship with her and i still dont want to. you told me your real name but did i tell anyone? no i didnt. even jiayih pleaded me i also didnt tell. reych was guessing like mad but i also didnt tell. i didnt tell anyone. no one. and you, you told michelle. michelle might probably spread it and you'll put ALL the blame on me again. let's just hope she forgets soon again.
i knew that if you hated something, you wouldnt do it. if people force you then you'll cry. because i didnt want to see you cry, something i didnt want to do i still do for you. we both hate one minute sharing, and you were unlucky and got called up twice. michelle still laughed at you and wasnt willing to help you. but what did i do? i knew i would humiliate myself in class but i still helped you. why? because you're my bestfriend and i love you to the point that i could throw my pride away just for you.
unless you dont know. im those type of people who take bestfriends seriously. i'd kick anyone's butt if they made you cry. if you lied to me, i'd end up getting more hurt than i would if other people lied. even if you didnt mean it, i'll take it seriously. i dont know why. maybe it's because i love you and believed everything you said. i know you were just joking about the hacking into phone line thing. i knew it all along. but i couldnt help but feel hurt because you were trying to lie to me just to tease me. and to make it worse, michelle added in her comment lagi. i felt mad that you'd actually do that to me as a joke.
you say you know how i feel. do you know im suffocating? do you know i have to take pills everyday because im still sick? cant you see that im still sick? cant you cut me some slack? these pills, they're making me weak to the point that even walking is tiring. i have to sleep early everyday because they made me tired. but i couldnt. because i have to study my butt off. if i didnt, i'd prolly get low marks and disappoint my parents. i've been sick for almost a month already. just when i was about to feel better, we had a fight. since wednesday, my coughing got worse and worse. yeah, i think all this depression and anger caused my coughing to get worse. did you know that i couldnt breathe properly because of it? when other people like you could breathe normally, it was hard for me? did you know i have to take in big gasps of air because i didnt inhale enough air. not even my parents know this. and im opening up to you in hopes that you'll understand. everyday, when im about to cough in front of my parents, i'll keep it in until they're out of sight. do you know how hard it is? i even choked on my own saliva. being sick sucks. i was actually glad that i took my medicine, because it made me forget stuff. it made me forget we were fighting for some time until i went to school. did you know how sad i was? you said i hurt you, but did you know me and you both are hurting me? my condition isnt stable right now. i might go depressed or happy any time. so i hope you'll understand how i feel now.
it's your decision now. whether you want to forgive me or not. it's your decision and i'll respect it. i on the other hand, already forgave you for what you did. and i always will no matter what. i might quarrel with you and get totally bitchy with you, but deep down i still love you and i always will because you're my bestfriend. i dont feel like caring anymore, i dont have the energy to. maybe when i get better, i'd go win your friendship back again. but now im helpless and you know it. maybe... we'll we friends again. who knows? anyways, i'll stay away from you if you want me to. and dont keep bringing up the past. it happened long time ago already as cheewee said. before was before, when we hated each other but now is now, now we're friends or maybe exfriends. dont know la.
love your bestfriend/ exfriend
Jane/ Sora13 ( now you know Karen)
ps: replying to this is totally up to you. i doubt that you'll reply or even forgive me but i'll still post this up. fyi, i dont want sorry anymore. i dont want anything from you anymore. i'll just keep quiet and live in my own world until you decide what you want to do.
| Wednesday, April 2, 2008,1:40 AM |
maybe a little of each?
ahhh. no crack jokes today. just a whole lot of ranting.
mehh. what? i need to rant =____= originally, i was even MORE angry but after reading some winning entries of annicon, i felt better.
anyways, whoo~ Ryoma Fish Heads got 3rd place.
we're awesome! ryoma fish heads hwaiting!
we have awesome members and an awesome leader, Linh unni ^^
normally, i'd be jumping around because we got 3rd place but no mood today.
okay. now i'll rant
first off, i am fucking pissed off at you not because you wanted to get the messages i sent to him, but because you fail as a friend. a best friend that is...
why cant you freaking understand how i fucking feel?!
do you think i liked being teased?
DO YOU FUCKING LIKE SOMEONE HANGING AROUND YOU AND BUGGING THE FUCKING HELL OUT OF YOU?! =____=
after all i did for you, i save you fucking ass when i could have ignored you and let you to your doom in class. i save you from one minute sharing two fucking times in a row. im not asking you to repay me back or for you to appreciate it. i did it because you were my friend and that i loved you for it. and i didnt want to see you getting sad over it. and what did you fucking do to me huh?! you like to see me get mad dont you? i guess this is what you call "seperti hujan jahut ke pasir". Membuat baik tidak ada tempatnya. i helped you and what do i get in return? you bugging me every fucking day. i didnt even want anything in return. and you didnt give me anything in return, instead you thought i'd never get mad at you because you're my best friend. unless you dont know, I HAVE FEELINGS TOO.
cant you just leave me alone? instead of making me mad every fucking day? ever since all of this started, you've been fucking annoying me about it. did you fucking know that?! kamlan la, did i ever bother you like this when YOU messaged HIM everyday last time? NO I FUCKING DIDNT. I just asked you to accept him and stuff like that, didnt i? Did I go around spreading fucking crap about you having a boyfriend?! fyi, I DIDNT. Yes, even when you made me mad multiple times i still kept my mouth fucking shut about it. to make it worse, you didnt only spread fucking crap around, you fucking annoyed me along with michelle. is it that fucking amusing? do you like to say him name in front of me multiple times to just to tease me?
now im not going to just sit around and let you bother me. fuck yes, im really mad at you. you took my friendship with you for granted. you kept bothering me because i was nice to you and took no fucking big actions. but now i will. i'll show you how much i fucking hate all of the crap you're doing to me.
seriously, im fucking pissed and cutting all connections with him these few days because i dont want you getting any fucking wrong ideas. i thought you would keep your mouth shut and understand how i feel but i guess you dont. you didnt even keep your fucking promise while i on the other hand, did. dont worry, even though im fucking pissed with you right now, i still wont tell you REAL name to anyone. i didnt even tell reychelle and jia yih. and they're also my best friends. instead, before you even fucking found out what i told them yesterday, you fucking yelled at me because you thought i told them your name. after you found out i didnt tell them, you didnt even apologize for yelling at me. seriously, you're starting to get on my nerves.
after the long rant, here's something for you to read ^^
it's the 3rd place annicon radidrama winner.
written by my dalis umma, this drama is about jonghun finding spiderman undies in his dirty laundry xD
meh. this cracked me up.
*it' all started out when jonghun did his dirty laundry.
Jonghun: sick with it! who does this belong to?? tell me now!!
Hongki: ew spiderman undies? , it' aint mines, you should already know my size jonghun
Jonghun: what creep would throw this in my dirty clothes basket! this is injustice!
Minhwan: I don't know hyung, do you want me to find out?
Jonghun: whoever did it, confess now! or i'll ...
Wonbin: hey~ guys I'm back
Jonghun: yah! it's you isn't it!
Wonbin: what did I do?? I'm sorry man, I didn't mean to take out your recording tape of Dr. Phil show
Jonghun: you what!!! nevermind about that! I can watch Dr. hottie. i mean Phil anytime but did you leave this spiderman undies in my basket?
Wonbin: what? why would you think it's me? im a man, I don't wear underwear.
Minhwan: huh O_O
Wonbin: I mean I wear boxer with manly image, not no sissy spiderman undies
Hongki: right.. what about that pink Lolipop printed undies I gave you for your birthday, you wore it last night v_v
Wonbin: How did you know?! D<
Hongki: I'm not telling *wink wink*
Jaejin: I'm home guys..
The member stare at Jaejin with a suspcious face.
Jaejin: hmm it must be the new J.Lo perfume I'm wearing.
Jonghun: Jaejin.. did you..?
Jaejin: did I what? I'm sorry hyung I didn't mean to throw out your top 100 hottest men magazine x:
Jonghun: You what??????!! you know dr. phil was # 7 on that !!
Minhwan: huh O_O
Hongki: alright someone need to fess up or Jonghun will go on about this all day.
Wonbin: Hongki, confess, confess now
Hongki: why should I? it doesn't even belong to me !!
Wonbin: oh come on babehh~ if you confess now, we'll all get away from this and sleep peacefully tonight.
Hongki: Why do I have to be the one ?
Wonbin: because your the hyung? plus Jonghun won't get mad at you as much since he loves you the most. remember? Jongki forever?
Minhwan: i thought jonghun hyung loves me the most..
I feel depress now x:
*minhwan start singing to get over the depression*
*i rolly wana touch myself...laa*
Jonghun: so nobody wants to confess ey?
Jaejin: it ain't mines..
Minhwan: hyung, I will find out for you. I'll do my best.
*Jonghun and Minhwan had a plan that night without letting the other member know, they decided to put a hidden camera in the laundry room, they put the spiderman undies on top of the dryer to catch the culprit.
That night, Jonghun couldn't sleep. All he thought about was the spiderman undies that was wash along with his clothes.
Jonghun: Dr. Phil, where are you when i need you the most
* It's Raining Men! Hallelujah! - It's Raining Men! Amen!*
Hongki: aish turn off the alarm clock!
Jonghun: sorry ^^
Jaejin: yah guys! get up! the spiderman undies is gone!
Jonghun: what? it is? we'll get you now..
Minhwan: Hyung the camera is missing x:
Jonghun: what! great now we will never found out who spiderman undies belong too
Minhwan: I'm sorry hyung, I thought I can help you. I tried to stay awake last night but I'm still a baby.
Hongki: whatever, anyone wants pancake?
Wonbin: Im up for some !
Hongki: psh, make your own
Jaejin: hey Minhwan, where were you last night?
Minhwan: what do you mean? I was sleeping like a baby
Jaejin: no.. you weren't in your bed, I got up and went to the bathroom, didn't see you.
Minhwan: hyung..you must be dreaming. I was sleeping in my bed the whole time.
Jaejin: hm maybe I was dreaming? hmm Jonghun hyung being naked was probably a dream too..
Minhwan: huh O_O
Jaejin: oh um nothing.
*the boys gather at the breakfast table*
Jonghun: seriously guys, which one of you took it?
Hongki: Jonghun, I didn't . You believe me right?
Jonghun: well hongki, I do know your size
Hongki: nobody know me like you do ;)
Wonbin: okay.. you guys are giving me goosebump
Hongki: why? is there something you want to confess??
Wonbin: um nooo..
Jaejin: can we just let this go? please.. Let i go
Jonghun: Let it go? let it go?!!
Hongki: uh ohh.. Jaejin you should never said that.
Jonghun: If i found out the damn truth, your going to get it.
Jaejin: why does jonghun scares me ?
Minhwan: you know.. Jaejin I know its you v_v
Jaejin: WHAT? you got to be kidding me.
Wonbin: arggh Just stop this undies madness! we can't just sit here and suspect each other.
Hongki: yeah we got to figure this out or it's going to drive Jonghun crazy
Minhwan: wheres jonghun hyung?
Jaejin: uh ohh he's playing with the butter again..
Wonbin: this is the first sign of jonghun pyscho ness ;0
Hongki: Alright guys, I have a plan.
Wonbin: serious? what is it?
Hongki: we blame wonbin
Jaejin & Minhwan: uh good idea hongki hyung ^^
Hongki: I know right? I come up with the goodest plan
Wonbin: how about i stab the fat out of you?
Hongki: -_- I'm kidding
Jaejin & Minhwan: ? ah.. okay
Minhwan: *pout* i really thought we'll go with hongki hyung plan :(
*That Night wonbin heard someone voice in the kitchen, he got out of bed*
Wonbin: what the hell is going on
Minhwan: hyung.. why are you up?
Wonbin: where you talking to someone?
Minhwan: nooo..
Wonbin: why are you up? it's past your bedtime
Minhwan: um I can;t sleep so i decided to eat something
Wonbin: what the hell, yah! thats my left over KFC spicy wings!
Minhwan: O_O
Wonbin: whatever you better clean the plate! and throw away the KFC box!
Minhwan: lazy azz bastard ;0
Wonbin: what??!
Minhwan: nothing ^-^
*Wonbin head back to bed, as soon as he got on Jonghun was all on him*
Wonbin: wte, get off me!
Jonghun: * al lie wand do do id fun a wad beck in too lub*
Wonbin: Pyscho bastard..
*back to minhwan in the dark kitchen*
Minhwan: Mr Spicy chicken wing, What should I do? Should I tell them? should I let jonghun Hyung know the truth?
What will happen to me if Jonghun hyung finds out?
Will he still love me, his cute dongsaeng again?
Will things still be the same between us?
it was me...
credits to Dalis umma and loveft-i forums.
| my world ★ |
| i own this wonderland |
Believe in the power of Karma. Whatever you do shall be repaid, be it good or bad. Oh, and this is my blog, so I obviously don’t give a damn about what you think.
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since 6th July 2008
♣ jane, sora, wasabii or milk
♣ 12.o1
♣ likes to photoshop
♣ studying in CHMS
♣ obsessed with touching hair
♣ loves chocolate way too much
♣ listens to korean music
♣ is random, weird and crazy
♣ is nice but mean in some ways
♣ does not like to be teased
♣ likes reading fanfics & manga
♣ a lousy writer
♣ i hate DOTA with passion
| my life ★ |
| what i read & want |
IWants
♠ a happy life
♠ his love and undivided attention
♠ improve my drawing
♠ more plushies (i bet this will never be crossed off)
♠ study hard
♠ more drawing tools
♠ stable emotions
♠ cuff earrings
♠ second piercing (left)
♠ more clothes
♠ learn hacking
♠ DIE SWINE FLU!!! PERISH!
♠ find cappu
♠
♠ get "dark lord"
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